No Explanation

I have always winced when asked… “So what is it that you do, Sara?” When you meet someone new this question is pretty inevitable. Let’s be real, it’s a dumb question but even I ask it sometimes out of habit or social propriety. I’m trying to get better at not asking it because I hate it.

Broadly, I hate this question because most people hate their jobs and don’t want to talk about them. And also why should we be defined by our work/ how we make money? Personally I hate this question because when I am asked… and I say I am an actor people immediately follow up with “What have you been in?” Most recently I was asked

“Have you been in anything notable?”

It’s like I’m being asked to prove or show evidence of what I just said. Or prove that I am successful in some regard. This has always been a tricky moment for me to navigate. But something has been shifting over the last few years…. I’ve gotten better at answering more naturally and with more ease. Shrugging off even my own projections of what would give me a sense of worth.

“No.” is what I responded to this question. And that’s it. No explanation attached, no excuse. No funny remark to self deprecate. God it felt good. It was so simple and so honest. I wasn't trying to be something I’m not and I also wasn’t trying to prove to this person or to myself that the only thing that could make me a real actor was if I was in something (cringe) notable.