bon anniversaire

It’s been exactly one year. One year since my ex and I broke up.

I didn’t realize it till this evening when I was in the shower. One whole year. I was feeling a bit mushy today and sent him a text…. “I’m so grateful we are in each others lives still.” We’ve somehow managed to become .. or rather sustain a friendship over the last few months. I never thought I’d be one of those people who could be friends with their ex. But my intuition lead me in another direction.

One thing I’ve started to see as I grow older is that you can’t put everyone in a box, “friend” or “lover” or “boyfriend” and tie a little bow on top…. there are about a million shades in-between. I think I live for these kind of connections and relationships. The ones I have trouble describing or understanding. Even though I tire endlessly at trying to do just that. Describe or understand. Gets me nowhere. I’m trying so hard to just let things be what they are, despite what I might want.

I’m also really enjoying my singlehood. Having crushes on everything that breathes and flirting like today is my last day on earth. Not texting anyone for hours and doing what I want when I want. Yes it is quite nice.